How often do you give what is asked for?

Why not, when you don’t?

What would happen if you did?

How can you adapt your plans?

Often we have a plan,

yet people want something else.

We may stay entrenched in our ideas,

and miss the opportunity.

Adapt your plan enough to give what asked for,

and then see what happens.

It may be worth the effort.

Expectations and Surprises

How often are you surprised?

How often because you had expectations?

Are you positively or negatively surprised?

How do you react to being surprised?

Hope for the best and plan for the worst.

This is how to deal with expectations and surprises.

We always have expectations,

yet it is upon us to curate them.

How can you set yourself up for success?

How can you prepare for potential surprises?

Preparation Stress

How stressful is preparation for you?

How do you feel once the real thing kicks off?

How much do you expect?

How much do you need to be in control?

Preparing for something is often stressful,

more stressful than the actual thing we prepare for.

During preparation, we have control of the process.

During the event, we often all but can watch.

This illusion of control causes anxiety.

The acceptance of no control causes calm.

Timing is Crucial

How good are you at timing?

How well-timed are your ideas?

How often do they fail due to timing?

Has the same idea worked at a different time?

Timing is crucial for success.

Projects, ideas, relationships,

everything in life depends on timing.

If an idea is not feasible now, revisit it later.

If you cannot form a relationship now, try again later.

Circumstances change, people change, the world changes.

Test, Test and Test

How often do you test things?

How can you test more?

How can you make a big decision into a test?

How do tests help you?

We often forget that we can test things.

We don’t have to make a final decision.

Most big decisions can be tested.

At least crucial parts of it.

Some cannot, which makes them significant.

Test what you can, guess what you can’t.

You Created This

What in your life do you despise right now?

Whose actions are annoying you?

How are they annoying you?

Why do you despise the things you do?

Our decisions in life lead to consequences.

Often, it is many years after the decision point.

Sometimes they come immediately.

Whatever you face in life, remember,

At some level in life, you have created this.

Your current situation and reality are up to you.

The only way to get out is to own it.

Love & Hate

How often do you despise someone you love?

How do you feel when this happens?

Why does this happen when it does?

What do you think about it?

People we love can drive us crazy.

They can be moody and annoying.

They have bad days, just like us.

It is normal to despise them on some days.

It is normal that they despise you some days.

Take a deep breath and rock it through.

Shapes and Sizes of Mistakes

How many mistakes do you make?

How big are the mistakes you make?

What type of mistakes are they?

How does this add up?

Some mistakes are small,

Some mistakes are big,

Some are bad timing,

Some are faulty understandings,

Some are wrong decisions,

They come in all shapes and sizes.

They all add up, big and small.

Many small ones are worth a big one.

Or a small one will make all the difference.

Or it will not matter at all.

Observe and find the mistakes you can,

then correct them one by one.

Intent, actions and outcomes

How do you react to an action you dislike?

How aware are you of the person’s intent?

How aware are you of the potential outcomes?

What intent do you interpret into it?

Often, we will be furious with another’s action.

Yet, we will not know their intent.

We will not even know the outcome yet.

We often interpret a malicious or egoistical intent.

It helps to have a conversation first.

It helps to embrace the action and maximise the outcome.

Control the Narrative

How well do you control the narrative about you?

Are you aware of what it should be?

Who else tries to control your narrative?

How can you gain better control?

What is the narrative you want to communicate?

Most of us are not in control of our narrative.

Often, other people control it.

Your friends, your family, your colleagues, society or the media.

However, you can gain control of it.

Think about what the narrative should be.

And start to communicate it proactively.

Unwanted blessings

How often do you receive blessings?

How often do you not want them?

Why did someone try to help you?

How did they try to help you?

Why did you not like it?

Often, people will do something good for us.

Yet, we do not appreciate the help.

People help for many reasons,

not always for your benefit, but theirs.

When you help another, ask first,

act after you have received permission.

The Basics

How well do you practice the basics?

How aware are you of the basics in what you do?

What happens when you fail at them?

What happens when you nail them?

The basics are the key to anything we do.

If we lack in the basics, we will struggle.

Fancy performances are a sliver without the basics.

The basics form the foundation for great things.

How Hard?

How hard is hard enough?

Up to which point can you learn?

How much can you learn?

How is the rate of diminishing returns?

We learn from hard things.

Yet, if it is too hard, we learn nothing.

If it is too hard, we break ourselves.

There is a tipping point - don’t cross that.

Yet, life is hard, and we will cross the point.

Then, it is about survival, not learning.

You can try to learn thereafter.

Expensive or not?

What is expensive?

How do you gauge price points?

What is the actual trade you enter?

What might you forget to consider?

Often, the expensive option is not expensive,

yet we might not realise.

Usually, we buy more than what we realise.

We might buy peace of mind.

We might buy better access.

We might buy efficiency.

The list is long; remember to consider wisely.

Dance more

How often do you dance?

Why do you dance when you do?

Why don’t you dance if you don’t?

How do you feel when you dance?

We all can dance more.

Be it alone at home or in public.

Dancing celebrates life.

Dancing makes one happy.

It does not matter if you are good.

It only matters that you enjoy yourself.

Helping others

How often do you help others?

How happily do they let you help?

How badly do they need help?

How do you know it is time to help?

People often need help, yet don’t accept it.

Often they will come screaming for help,

yet only on their terms.

When you help others, do it on your terms.

Succumbing to others’ terms is a recipe for trouble.

Preserve the relationship: help on your terms or not at all.

To act or not to act

How do you know you need to act?

How do you know you'd better watch?

Where is the point of action?

What emotions do you feel?

With many things in life, we face two options:

to act or not to act.

If you have a feeling of potential regret,

it is a sign you might want to act.

If you have a feeling of complete resistance,

it is a sign you might want to watch.

Push through vs Staggering

How do you deal with big workloads?

Do you push through or stagger the load?

How do you feel once you are done?

Which delivers the better results?

Faced with huge workloads, we face two options:

Push through or stagger it.

I wish I could tell you one is always right.

Yet, in truth, they both have merit.

It depends on the situation and your stamina.

Be aware of what is possible, or face the consequences.

Our Start Into Life

How was your start into life?

What was your family like?

How many opportunities did you have?

Which burdens were put on you?

Which environment did you grow up in?

What talents were you born with?

We often forget the hand we were dealt.

We often forget how this influences our decisions.

We often forget how we try as best as we can.

We often forget to be kind to ourselves thereafter.

Be kind to yourself — life is not easy.

Meltdowns

How often do you have meltdowns?

When do you have them?

Why do you have them?

How do they progress?

Meltdowns happen to all of us.

To some more frequently and for different reasons.

Some key ingredients are needed:

Physical exhaustion, mental strain and task overwhelm.

When all three conditions meet:

Stop what you are doing and get some rest.

The alternative is not pretty.